To My Brother, Noe, With Love
I am writing this message for my brother Noe. If I have never told you this before Noe, I apologize that it took me this long. As my big brother, I have always loved you and admired you tremendously. You have been one of the most influential persons in my life. Perhaps outside of Mom and Dad, you have influenced me more than any other person in the world.
Ever since I can remember, I always wanted to be just like you. As a kid, I loved hanging out with you and playing with you and I wanted to do everything that you did. Your love and acceptance of me has always been a major blessing in my life. From the time that I was just a child, till today, I can’t remember a time in my life, when faced with some adversity, that I didn’t ask myself “how would Noe handle this”? You have always been a great role model and a hero to me. I have grown to admire you in much that same way that I admire dad.
You have always been a man of intergrity above all else, a tireless worker, an inspirational father, a dedicated husband and a consumate professional. You have the most “can-do” attitude of just about anyone that I have ever known. Much of what I have accomplished in my life is a direct result of the traits that I have learned both from dad and from you.
You have always been there for me when I was needy and you never asked for or expected anything in return. And I know that I am not the only one that you have supported in this way.
When you had your heart attack two years ago and you almost died, I wanted you to know that I loved you and would be there for you as much as I possibly could. Once again, your strength and courage in the face of insurmountable odds was awe inspiring. The first day or two after your heart attack, when your life hung in the balance, I honestly believed that your own medical staff didn’t think that you were going to make it. But I KNEW you would. I swear, Noe, I never had a even a shadow of a doubt in my mind that you would pull through. The advantage that I had over your doctors was that I knew what a fighter you were. They could only see your physical heart. I knew that you had more heart than their crude instruments could measure. And once again, you didn’t let me down. Your tenacity continues to inspire me.
I have no way of knowing what sort of residual effects that you are still dealing with, but I do know that you are still struggling with your recovery. I know that your memory is still not completely recovered, and as a result, your confidence has been shaken. My only message that I want to convey to you is that you have nothing to be ashamed of and you have nothing to fear. You have stared death in the face and kicked it’s ass.
There is not a person alive who doesn’t question their own abilities from time to time. Though most won’t admit it, fear is a constant companion to us all and the fear of failure can bring on paralyzing consequences. Nobody likes to fail, especially those who are not used to failing very often. And if you don’t try, you can’t fail. So maybe it’s just easier to not try anything at all than it is to try something that we don’t feel comfortable with and fail. But I want to remind you that the only people that never fail are those that don’t do anything.
Noe, I love you and I admire you and I have complete faith in you. I know that no matter what the challenge, you have the ability and the internal fortitude to rise to the occasion. Heck, you’re the only one I know that has two or three Emmy’s sitting on their mantel. EMMY’s, Noe, EMMY’s. That’s something to get excited about. And you have God and your family and your friends behind you. So I want you to promise me that you will wake up everyday and make every conceivable effort that you can to reach out to everyone that you know and let them know that you need a job, you want a job and you will do anything that you have to do to get a job and keep a job and help support your family.
I am praying for you and know that you won’t let me down. You never have before.
Qualifying Events
If you make your living selling, then the term “qualifying event” should be important to you. But in most cases, unless you are in the insurance field, you might not have even heard of the term. So pay attention. What is a “qualifying event”? When I use the term “qualifying event”, I mean a change in a prospects situation that may impact their need for your product or services. For example, if you are a real estate agent, what possible events fit the description of a qualifying event? Well, for starters, a death in the family, a birth in the family, a marriage, a divorce, a raise in pay, a cut in pay or a financial windfall all are examples of qualifying events.
Say for instance you get married. There is a high probability that you may be in the market for a new house. Especially if you and your spouse were living in seperate quarters prior to your marriage, you certainly wouldn’t keep paying two rents. Now you may decide to both move into one or the other places, but the conversation of purchasing a new house will at least have to be considered at some point. That is why marriage is a qualifying event for real estate agents. Another example would be if your elderly parents pass away. What do you do with their house? Most middle aged grown-ups already own a home, so when their parents die, their house typically will be put up for sale. As a real estate agent interested in listing houses, that would be another qualifying event. So you get the picture. The point is that many sales people that I know never grasp the connection between one event and the other.
To further prove the impact that qualifying events have on purchasing habits, think of the times that you bought a new house. What event transpired in your life that made you decide that you needed to buy a new house? Odds are, one of the events that I listed above happened to you. I know that the last time that I bought a house it was because I just got married. Shortly thereafter, we were expecting a baby and we considered buying a bigger house but opted instead to stay put and just add on a couple of rooms.
Once you figure out what are the qualifying events for your products, you can begin to strategize ways that you can take advantage of it. For instance, again in the real estate example, watching the birth announcements in your local newspaper would be a good way to target prospective clients. If your local newspaper has a business section that highlights promotions of local executives, that would also be a good target market for you.
Not all purchases are based on “qualifying events” as I’ve described them, but if you study your current industry long enough, I’m sure you’ll be able to see certain common indicators that might be predictors’ of future purchases for your service or product.
Another example might be that if I was selling automobiles, I’d might want to consider making friends with some auto repair shops around the area and find ways to work in unison with them. If an auto repair shop can tip you off to customers that have unreliable cars, or that may need expensive repairs, wouldn’t that be a good qualifying event for a car salesman?
In my business, a good prospect is a business that is either relocating or expanding their current location and needs additional telecommunications cabling infrastructure. So if a business has a lease that is about to expire, that is a great qualifying event for me. So if I can find a commercial broker that is willing to work with me and help direct me toward these types of prospects, I can beat many of my competitors to the punch.
If you think about it hard enough, you should be able to identify several “qualifying events” that can put you in a position to out maneuver your competitors and help you beat them to the punch.
As a final tip. If you can find other sales professionals that don’t compete directly with you, but require prospects with the exact same qualifying events as you do, by networking with them and sharing your leads, you can double your productivity with little increase in effort.
The Bigger You Are…
Even the wealthiest can be brought down if they don’t use common sense. Today it is being reported that Michael Jackson’s Never Land property is facing foreclosure. If you are over the age of twenty, you probably remember a time when Michael Jackson had more money that Bill Gates.
In fact, Jackson had so much money, I’m not so sure that his wealth didn’t contribute to his ultimate downfall. He was so rich that he was able to build himself a wall of insulation that shielded him from the real world, until he ultimately lost touch with reality and went off the deep end.
The lesson here is that no matter who you are, you are never so wealthy and so superior that you are immune from the laws of common sense. The same fan base that made Michael Jackson a wealthy man, are the same fans that can take it all away.
So what is my point? What does Michael Jackson’s downfall have to do with business? or You? Or anything for that matter. Just this. Michael Jackson got spoiled. He thought he was invincable and that there would always be a demand for his products. Not anymore.
At one time Michael Jackson had more money that Paul McCartney, the former beatle. In the 80’s, he outbid Paul and Yoko Ono for the rights to the Lennon/McCartney song library. He grew excentric, to say the least, lost touch with his fan base, flaunted his picadillos, thumbed his nose at his critics and believed thought the rules didn’t apply to him. He found out the hard way that we all have to play by the same rules. Nothing last forever. You cannot live on your past laurels for too long.
The business lesson in this story is that Michael Jackson was a product, just like the products that you sell. Michael Jackson was a brand, just like Nike and Microsoft. And just like American automakers in the 80’s, IBM in the 90’s and American Airlines in the 2000’s, even the mightiest can hit rock bottom if they allow themselves to think that they are above the fray.
Michael Jackson was born with a God given ability to sing, dance and innovate. His voice was and undoubtably, still is, exquisite, and his dancing ability was fresh and creative. His album “Thriller”, to my knowledge, is the best selling album of all time. I’m sure Michael Jackson isn’t broke and if he lives to be 100 years old, will probably still die a very wealthy man. But he may never make another significant impact in the musical arena again because he has allowed himself to become so delusional to believe that he could ignore his fan base, which ultimately are his customers and do anything that he wants without having to suffer any negative consequences from his actions.
Hand Written Thank You Notes
When was the last time that you sent one of your customers a hand written thank you note? If you’re like most typically salesmen, the answer is probably "never". Hand written notes are a thing of the past. Gone by the way side like carbon paper and manual type-writers. It’s because hand written notes are so rare that they carry such impact. Think about the last time you received a hand written note in the mail from someone. Didn’t it make you stop and think about the thought that the sender put into that note? I promise you, your competitors aren’t sending hand written thank you notes and that exactly why you should be doing it.
Something to Meditate
I want to give you something to meditate on. Here is goes. What is time? And what is space? If time had a beginning and time has an end, what came before and what comes after? And what about space? Does is have any boundaries? If space does have boundaries, what could possibly exist outside of those boundaries? Just something I thought about and something you might want to think about. My point is that time and space have to be man-made devices because if not, what exists outside the boundaries of these things? Something has to fill the void. That is why you’ve always heard it said that God always was and he always will be. I mean, think about it. Somebody had to create this place we call our Universe. If not, where did it come from and what was here before? So my contention is that both space and time are man-made devices. They are merely tools that we created in order to make sense of this physical world.
If you can think back to your earliest memories when you were a child, don’t you remember thinking about things that came before? I have always had memories, faint as they may be, that I somehow have always been alive. And I also have always believed that somehow, I would live forever. There was just no way that I was going to die. It is only very recently that I am beginning to understand that my physical body will eventually have to die, but my spirit and my soul will indeed live forever. So in many respects, this life is nothing more than a prolonged dream. When we are finally liberated from our physical shells, we’ll find ourselves waking up to our true nature and realize that this passing was just a long learning experience for us. Considered in this light, it makes no sense to take ourselves too seriously. Laugh, love, live and learn. That’s what I think we are here to do.
Self Motivation
What do you want? And why do you want it? If you can answer those two questions, you have the key to unlocking your full potential. Some of us want achievement, some of us want recognition, some of us want personal growth and some of us want professional development. These are just some of the things that could be motivating us, among others. Love and fear are two or the biggest motivating factors known to man. The key is to find out what makes you tick.
Living in a capitalist society, most of us have come to accept the notion that we are all motivated by money. Well, as I’ve said before, money is a secondary motivator, but it’s not a primary motivator. The things that money can buy might be a primary motivation in our lives, but in most cases, even nice cars and big houses aren’t really our primary motivators. It’s the benefits that come with these nice things that we really and truly want. If you can take a moment to stop and think about what really brings you happiness, then you will be a long way toward figuring out how to motivate yourself. And once you are motivated, anything is possible. Remember, discipline is the art of remembering what you want. Because when you figure out what you really want, you’ll find a way to achieve it.
Motivation
What motivates you? This could be one of the most important questions you could ever ask yourself. It’s funny, but you know, until recently, I don’t think I ever considered this question myself. But some interesting conversations happened when I did ask myself this question. What DOES motivate me? I never really thought about it, so when I did, it made me do some deep self-analysis.
Motivation may be the most misunderstood subject known to man. My guess is that most of us don’t really know what motivates us. And if we don’t even think consciously about what we are motivated by, thinking about what motivates others is probably going to be the furthest thing from our minds. And both of these oversights can stifle our career ascent.
Motivation is like fuel. It’s what drives us. And if motivation is fuel, then fear is unleaded fuel and love is super premium. Most people just assume that most of what we do is driven by money. But money is not a true motivator. It’s the things that we can get in exchange for money that are the true motivating factors in our lives. And most of the things that we acquire with money are a subset of the base set of motivators like love, fear, respect, self-fulfillment, pride, wanting to win or hating to lose, just to name a few. For example, if you work hard because you want to make a lot of money so that you can buy that nice, new BMW convertible, the real question you should ask yourself is why do you want that car? Sure it’s fun to drive with the top down and feel the wind blowing in your hair. But wouldn’t riding a horse give you the same sensation? The truth of the matter is that having that car would give your pride a big jolt and maybe even improve your status in the eyes or your friends, family and loved ones. At least that might be your impression, anyway.
After giving it some thought, I came to the conclusion that like everything else, motivation is generally an inherited factor. That’s probably why most people have a hard time climbing out of the socio-economic class that they were born into. If your father wasn’t motivated by having a big house, a new car, a yacht, and a second home in the country, odds are you probably won’t be motivated by those things either. And even if you are, your drive and ambition are probably inherited traits also, so achieving those things won’t come easy. Therefore, when you fail to achieve them, your instinct kicks in and tells you that it’s OK. If your father didn’t need those things, then you don’t need those things either. And maybe you don’t. After all, everybody knows that happiness is much more important than money and of course, money can’t buy you happiness. But that’s not my point. What’s important is to understand that we are all motivated by different things. And the more that we understand about what drives us, the easier it will be for us to fill our own tanks in order to help us to achieve the things that we really do want.
And what’s even more important is that once we understand what motivates us, we begin to get a better understanding about what motivates others. Motivating others is how you really get things done. That’s how leaders are born.
